Politickers(1916)

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Plot Summary:Major Mannering is a veteran of the Civil War. His household is small, consisting of himself, May, his granddaughter, and an old negress housekeeper. Oscar and Conrad, two middle-aged lawyers, are almost daily visitors at his home. They are rivals for May. May, however, is in love with Frank. The Major is opposed to her marrying Frank, because in his opinion no man who is less than fifty can make a decent sort of husband. The Major is such an enthusiastic student of the strategy of war that when he begins to relate some of the terrible events of the war he utilizes the ornaments in the room to demonstrate the effects of battle. During these harangues, the lawyers and May are wont to slink out of the room without the Major noticing their absence. One day Conrad rushes into the Major's library with joyful news that he has been nominated for mayor on the Republican ticket. The Major hates politicians and Conrad is told to leave immediately. Strange to relate, however, the reception given to Oscar when he announces that he has been nominated for mayor is quite the opposite that accorded Conrad. Oscar and Conrad get an opportunity to propose to May in the park. May gets rid of Conrad by urging him to resign in favor of the Major, something which Conrad wouldn't do for the sake of any woman, and of Oscar by putting him off till election day. Election day arrives and the Major is returned the winner. He is so happy that he is willing to grant May anything. She seizes the occasion to broach the subject of her union with Frank, and the Major in an outburst of joy insists on their immediate marriage. That evening the Major sees himself serenaded and when he bows from his window to his admirers, he feels like a conquering hero. His imagination is brimful with visions of political grandeur. If a mayor, why not a president? Yes that is his ultimate aim. The next morning he kisses May farewell and sees her and Frank off in their automobile on their honeymoon. He then returns to the library to peruse the glowing eulogies that the papers are sure to pour out upon him. What then is his amazement when the headline informs him in staring capitals that a recount has given Conrad the election by a small plurality. Seething with rage the Major falls back in his chair. If he could only murder somebody. Just at this moment Oscar and Conrad enter, both rigged out in their best togs, each carrying a box of candy and an enormous bouquet under their arms. Both offer the Major their heartfelt sympathy and ask for May. Five minutes later they leave very much the worse for wear while the Major is breathing with a sense of relief as he contemplates the scattered debris of candy and flowers.