片头笑话：
1、Two elderly women are at a Catskill mountain resort .One says,"The food at this place is really terrible."The other says,"I know,and such small portions."
有两个老太去Catskill山旅游。其中一个说：“这地方食物可真够糟的。”另一个说：“可不是嘛！而且分量还那么少！”
That’s essentially how I feel about life:full of loneliness,misery,suffering and unhappiness and it's all over much too quickly.
你瞧，我对生活的看法也基本如此：尽管充满了寂寞、痛苦、悲惨和不幸， 但又觉得一切都过得太快。
2、I never want to belong to any club that would have someone like me for a member.
我永远不想加入一个会让我这样的人加入的俱乐部。
That's the key joke of my adult life in terms of my relationships with women.
这个笑话很好地解释了我长大后和女人的关系。
片尾笑话：
This guy goes to a psychiatrist and says,"Doc,my brother's crazy.He thinks he's a chicken!"And the doctor says,"Why don't you turn him in?"The guy says,"I would,but I need eggs."
有个家伙去看精神病医生：“医生，我兄弟疯了。他以为自己是一只鸡！”医生说：“那你怎么不把他带来？”那家伙回答说：“我是想着带他来着，可是我想吃鸡蛋啊！”
Well,I guess that's,now,how I feel about relationships.They're totally irrational,crazy and absurd.But I guess we keep going through it because most of us need the eggs.
我想这就是我现在对爱情的感觉。爱情完全是非理性的，疯狂的甚至荒谬的。但我们还是经历这一切，因为我们大多数人都想吃那些鸡蛋。
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