I remember once imagining what my life would be like, what i'd be like.
I pictured having all these qualities, strong, positive qualities... that people could pick up on from across a room. But as time passed, few ever became any qualities i actually had. And all the possibilities i faced and the sorts of people i could be, all of them got reduced every year to fewer and fewer... until finally they got reduced to one... to who i am.
Things didn't work out the way i predicted. Acepting that is not easy, but easy doesn't enter into grown-up life.
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